Over the last month or two I have reflected over and over again my relationship with my parents. I know we are made up of a physical body determined by genetics but I also realize we are a product of the our environment. My parents gave me so much more than DNA. My parents had such a momentousness impact on the person I am today. We lived together most of our lives. I turned 50 this July and most of that time my mother and father was there to give me encouragement and advise. I remember many occasions when Mom and Dad took advantage of teaching moments helping me think about my actions. As I got older we had very in-depth discussions. Those who know my parents realize this occurred almost non stop. I really enjoyed talking with my parents. I have tried to do the same thing with my kids but I am not as talkative as my father. Unfortunately, because of self induced time constraints, I was not able to give my entire talk about Grandpa. I would like to leave that here to help with my healing and interested parties. Below is the talk I wanted to give at Grandpa's funeral. I know the talk below is fragmented and all over the place but we all had a very hard time coming to grips with all the losses. Grandpa was the third funeral our family experienced over the course of four months. Life can and will change on a dime. We all signed up for mortality so we could progress to a better existence. A big thanks to all those who have helped me hold on to the iron rod through my moments of utter despair and weakness. We love you all,
Grandpa Glassford September 5 1929 - October 24, 2011
Friend
Life Coach
Friend
Innovator
Friend
motivator
Friend
Independent
Friend
Fisherman
Friend
opinionated
Friend
thinker
friend
problem solver
Friend
outdoors-man
Friend
fisherman
Friend
You get the idea ..... he was my friend!
Grandpa spoiled me rotten....with love, time, and compassion. I cannot express the love and respect I have for my Dad. No matter what my interests, he supported me. I had great discussions with my father at the dinner table, before bed, driving or working, he was always there to listen and tolerate my strange and bizarre interests and dreams.
As a little boy I loved birds, so Grandpa brought me home four black Modena pigeons. He helped me build and raise a flock of over 150 birds. We collected a very unique population from different locations in San Diego. I developed a keen interest in genetics at this time. When we built our house in Lindon I wanted to start racing pigeons. Grandpa and I talked about doing this for years so when we had the chance we went for it. Dad, Mom and Lynne helped me design and build a beautiful loft. We were all very proud of it. He helped me design work outs for my birds and drove many miles to drop the birds off for their exercise. We had great talks, fun and success together.
When grandpa and grandma came to Utah and live with us we put him to work. Besides helping raise the kids we put together an art stone retaining wall. It took us an entire summer of six hours a day to build it. I can’t look at that wall without having many found memories. I enjoyed working on projects with him.... I learned much more then how to build a wall. He meticulously made sure each brick was laid as perfectly as it could. He used a dull ax and some other tools to smooth the brick and make them lay evenly.
He worked very hard to protect us from life’s dangers and cruelties. He encouraged us to make good friends and always be good.... stand for the right, walk away, remember who you are and what you represent. He would say remember ….. you are a Glassford. I have tried to live up to my family heritage and hope we can all exemplify the goodness of grandma and grandpa.
Grandpa taught me to work at a very early age. I remember he would give mom a list of chores and Dad would check to make sure our work was done. He loved to work and fix all things broken... cars, washing machines, sprinkler systems, doors, walls, toilets, you name it... he fixed it. He also fixed us many times. We have all had talks with grandpa when we felt beaten and broken,his words of encouragement were priceless.
Grandpa had the desire and ability to help build character in young men. He spent countless hours coaching, young people from softball, baseball and basketball. Coaching is what he did, it did not matter the activity: bowling, fishing gardening, or barbecue. He was there to help you do your best. He spent a significant amount time coaching each one of his kids. I trusted Grandpa and new he always had my best interest at heart.
My parents never sought for material riches. Instead they invested an abnormal amount of time and effort in creating eternal friendship. My parents were not perfect but I always new they had an unfathomable amount of love for us. Their ability to encourage us and help us feel successful and productive was unmatched. Oh how I miss them! Dad’s childhood and teenage years are somewhat of a mystery. No matter how hard I tried to have him open up about the past I was only given glimpses into this corridor of his life experience. Regardless of what happened during this time period it helped him become the great father and friend he is today. I am so grateful he made the decision to put family and people first.
He taught us the gospel the best he could through example and activity. As a young family we were immersed in our ward culture. He was actively involved in the young mens and sporting programs of the church. He worked hard to help the young men of the ward. He fought for girls athletics when there was there was reluctance to let girls participate.
Some of my earliest Memories with grandpa involve fishing. I remember Uncle Toozie and Dad coming home with many big fish. The two of them took me to Parris lake and I caught my first fish on a cane pool. We fished many waters over the years. From Southern California to Alaska and all over Utah. Here are some of grandpa’s favorite fishing holes (no particular order just as they came to me) Flaming Gorge, Gulf of Alaska, Bait Barge, Lake Moreno, Ocean Beach Pier, Pine Valley, Provo River, Schofield, Strawberry, Lincoln Beach Utah Lake (60+ white bass) San Diego Bay, Tom Hans Light House etc. All of these locations bring back wonderful times with Grandpa. When young he fished the Mississippi and Missouri rivers to mention a few.
When I was about eight years old grandpa coached me though my first big catch. We were along the banks of the Colorado river near a dam. I begged grandpa to take the pole but he would not. I slid down the embankment and only feet away was the massive rushing water. Grandpa had a hold of me as to not let me slide into the torrential flow. I was really frightened but he helped me land my first big fish.
The last few years were hard for grandpa to fish.... it took lots of his energy but he still wanted to go. This summer we went catfishing at Utah Lake and went camping and fishing at Payson Lakes. Grandma and Grandpa enjoyed Payson lakes and have caught many fish along the dam. One of his favorite places to fish and camp was Pine Valley in Southern Utah. We have been to this location more than any other other fishing spot. Grandpa ruled Pine Valley. His techniques and secret bait had people all over the little reservoir coming to him for help. He would gladly give bait, hooks and advise to whomever asked.
Besides fishing here are some of the some of the activities I will always remember doing grandpa:
* breeding Daylilies: we pollinated many daylilies. We have grown thousands of his seedlings and have introduced a few of these. One of his favorite introductions was Lisa Inez.
*Gardening
*watering... he loved to water the garden and took care of my plants up to the day he left for Vegas. He would also watch me water the pumpkins and gourds when I got home from work. He would sit on his chair and talk with me and rest while I watered the plants.
*bees: he built many hives and frames for me. We spent many days manipulating hives.
When he prayed I always new he would bless the bishops, prophets and apostles, stake presidents and the leaders of this great nation. He had a love for God and Country. He served in the United States Air Force and has always been a big supporter of the young women and men who defend our country.
The day to day interactions with grandpa and grandma has been a blessing for our entire family. We have truly had a unique experience and have been taught how to love and support one another. Grandma and Grandpa ate breakfast every day together. After Moms passing we ate together before we started the days activities. It was a special moment to share goals, read the paper and just chat. When leaving for work Grandpa would walk out to the drive way and wave and give me the thumbs up.
Grandpa served his family valiantly and will be sorely missed. Dad let us all help him through mom’s passing knowing this would be a comfort to us all. This has been a life altering experience that I will cherish forever. I am so happy he is reunited with mom and I hope I can finish my life as courageously as my Dad. I love you Dad
